Someone else in a health chat I frequent posted about depression during pregnancy and it reinforced my thoughts on the internet being a godsend for connecting people in a way we have lost in the last century.
Historically women have gathered around other women as they grew and raised their children passing along knowledge and expertise, unwanted and wanted advice, and support. We live in a time where that just isn't done. We are expected to trust the "experts" like our pediatrician and even to just go along with the mainstream view perpetuated by TV and other outside sources.
I was lucky to birth in a place where we also held weekly mothering meetings and in those first months of motherhood I had a wonderful group of women walking with me and a leader who had walked the road before passing on her experience to trust.
Between my kids the center closed and I moved so I was sad that I didn't have that hand holding from a group of women when I got pregnant with my son. I found in my search for a more informed researched pregnancy and childrearing my OWN community of mothers online. We feel similarly in so many areas even though we completely disagree about other things our parenting passions keep us close.
When Post partum mood disorders hit on the site we often see it coming and are ready with a shoulder to cry on, a kind work of advice and often a phone call. We can't be there physically, but we lend support emotionally and help the woman afflicted work out what she is feeling by giving her a place to pour it out to sympathetic ears (or eyes really), and brainstorm with her ways to combat it.
It is also a wonderfully informed group of women who can tell you what to think about or try when considering birth options, breastfeeding, circumcision, night time parenting... a plethora of of issues we as mothers face daily.
I have been a member of this community for 4 years and it has changed my life. I have learned more because I have been asked more questions, and I have been able to help others in their times of need as well. We may not be able to hug each other in person, but the virtual arm around the shoulder goes a long way!
Hi I beleive I am the person to whom you are refuring to in your blog. I was hopeing you would have some suggestions on where to go or who to talk to. At this point being a mother of 2 boys, pregnant and my husband choosing to remove himself from the family I feel very alone even though my family (mom and sister) try to help the things they say are more based on my feelings and my well being. I think I need an outsiders point of veiw or at the very least someone who has been through what I'm going throw.
ReplyDeleteCPmom, first I'm sorry you are in such a difficult situation. Do you have a care provider for prenatal care and birth?
ReplyDeleteI asked some questions of people specializing in pregnancy and birth issues and they recommend this woman if you have insurance for therapy. http://www.marriagefriendlytherapists.com/maureencampion.php
There is a lot of conflicting information on depression medication and pregnancy. So read up on it and ask lots of questions.
If you just want an ear email me and I am happy to be so. my email is spinningbacon@gmail.com
I will continue to research for you and ask friends, but I would need to know a little more about you before making any more suggestions.
Heidi Jo